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CicelyRobinLaing©2014

 

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They always say, “Ask your kid. They know more about this computer stuff than you old geezers.”…
I have found that that is not always true… after all they have to learn it first some place…
If age has taught me anything about “software”…
It’s that most of my problems can be smoothed over by dark chocolate and a bit of well aged Scotch…
And hardware problems are well beyond my reach when I grab for the sledge hammer…
So, I accept that at some point my children will surpass me when it comes to technology…
But knowledge is not the same as wisdom…
and I have plenty of one and just enough of the other…

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Words and image by Cicely Robin Laing © 2014

 

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CicelyRobinLaing©2014

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Warm Autumn days need to be enjoyed and remembered…
Like childhood…
We should treasure those sweet fleeting moments…

I watched my young son walk away from me on one such day…
A moment of independence and purpose…
Though I let him go, I wanted to call him back and hold him tight…

I was both happy and sad…
I wanted to see him walk on with out me…
Confident, capable, flexible, happy…

A split moment of the future now…
A time that hasn’t come yet…
He still needs me, and I don’t want to let him down…

Try as I might, I can’t make him confident…
I can’t teach him independence or force him to be flexible…
There is no guarantee for happiness…

I can only care for him, try to protect him…
Perhaps guide him by example…
And let him know that I am as fallible as any, and that is okay…

I”ll watch him walk away, and then turn back to me…
I can’t help but love him… He is my little boy…
But he is already his own man…
He always has been…

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This post is for Day 26 of my September project… finally posted… late… but hell… it’s here now right?

October’s project is on hold for now… I need the time to work with my son.
Our real project for this month is to settle into a new routine of homeschool and doctor’s appointments.
I have a lot to learn myself, before I can really be a good teacher for my child.
I know plenty about reading, math, history and science…
What I don’t know is how my son will best be able to learn…
The way the schools chose to try to teach him didn’t work…
I will have to create an new paradigm…
Un-schooling here we come…

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September’s project had different themes for each day of the week:
“Macro Monday”
“Tale Spin Tuesday”
“Whatever Wednesday”
“Thoughtful Thursday”
“Family Friday”
“Caturday Saturday”
& “Seriously Silly Sunday”

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Image and words by Cicely Robin Laing © 2014

 

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CicelyRobinLaing©2014

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This week has been full of leaps…………

The biggest being that I decided to pull my son out of his regular class and home school him….
So, I am now my own “school district” coordinating special ed services and creating a new “un-schooling” curriculum for a brilliant boy who hates anything that involves sitting for long periods in “school”…

Today we are at the U of MN doing testing at the Pediatric Neuropsychology Clinic…. (Imagine a long pause here…..) I was just called out of the waiting room to come help my son. He was being evaluated and had a breakdown. The down side of that, is they won’t be able to do all the tests they want. The upside, they see exactly the  emotional behavior and difficulties my son struggles with almost everyday. 

End result… They are going to get recommendations for therapies starting Monday, instead of in 4-6 weeks. Finally… (with a tear and a sigh of relief…) we will be getting some HELP!

No matter what happens… it’s still a leap… and…

I’m silent screaming all the way down…………………

 

but it’s a happy scream….

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It is so hard as a parent to sit and discuss your young child’s mental illness… (We so want to call it anything but an illness… we say difficulties, issues, problem… “no, my child’s not sick.”) …. Really, any illness is devastating… but the weird stigma attached to mental illness adds a flavor to that lump in your throat like no other… Even sharing it here… not knowing who of you out there reading this might feel about this… my sharing something so very private… is a kind of vulnerability I am not completely comfortable with…. and yet…
I think it might do some good.
Maybe for me…
maybe for others…
or it may make no difference at all….

I don’t know… (LEAP!)

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I suppose this counts toward my “Family Friday” Post…. I may not have time later to do another… still screaming…

Day 19 of my September project…

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September’s different themes for each day of the week:
“Macro Monday”
“Tale Spin Tuesday”
“Whatever Wednesday”
“Thoughtful Thursday”
“Family Friday”
“Caturday Saturday”
& “Seriously Silly Sunday”

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Image and words by Cicely Robin Laing © 2014

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CicelyRobinLaing©2014.

One of the challenges of doing a daily blog is that sometimes…
life has other plans for you.
It is now after 11 pm and I am just sitting down to do my writing…
I’m traveling in time alright…
but it’s going faster than I am…

I’m not the most organized person, but that is not why I am typing away near midnight…. How did I spend my day you ask? Why didn’t I have time to write my bit of nonsense?

Well, today I went to school. I had to go to school. I got to spend the whole day with my son’s fifth grade class. It wasn’t a field trip or a volunteer opportunity, it was a parenting research trip. Not something that I planned to do on my Friday, and not something I would choose to do for fun. I went there because my son needed my help… When your child needs extra help, you do what you have to do.

Just to mess with my mind, I had already planned to write my “Family Friday” blog about my son, his difficulties with school and why he needs extra help…. but I am so unbelievably tired from my day… (which included other things as well…)  that I can’t even mentally grasp what I want to say… So, I will have to leave those thoughts floating around in my head, and let them worm their way out another day. (Besides, I so often tell myself, who really wants to hear about my parenting struggles anyway… I don’t know.)

Let’s just say, that school for my son, is a minefield of stress bombs… both for him and for everyone trying to help him. Like so many kids, my son is a strong, intelligent, creative, complex and loving child… and he doesn’t fit the one size fits all school model. He’s the best kid in the world (I’m his mom… I get to say that…) but he presents a whole boat load of challenges…

Okay, I know, every kid comes with challenges… how dare I …

Well, I have three children and I agree that they are all challenges, but… some are more challenging than others. Particularly when it comes to the parenting time commitment. Parenting is a 24 hour a day job. But what you do during those hours varies. No parent is on high alert the whole time… (at least I hope not… that would be a good way to burn out like a fiery ball of space debris.)
No, we get to have down time, and times we can go do our own things, times when we can leave someone else in charge. And as the kids get older, we let them be more on their own, because they have to learn to self regulate and be self sufficient… right?

Well, some kids are slower to get there than others. Some never quite get there at all… and some parents have to deal with extra “time commitment”… I am one of those… at least right now. I don’t mind so much, really, it’s my main job and I love my kids…
But sometimes it means…
I don’t get to do the things I said I would…
or do things I really want to do…
Because family comes first…
Everything else comes second…
including this bit of nonsense…

So… that is my excuse.
One I imagine I will use again…
with no real regrets…
but with a great desire for a long nap……….

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It’s still on time… it hasn’t hit midnight here… yet…

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Day 12 of my September project… “Family Friday” …

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September’s different themes for each day of the week:
“Macro Monday”
“Tale Spin Tuesday”
“Whatever Wednesday”
“Thoughtful Thursday”
“Family Friday”
“Caturday Saturday”
& “Seriously Silly Sunday”

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Image and words by Cicely Robin Laing © 2014

 

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CicelyRobinLaing©2014

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I blame parenting…
if only I could stay in bed until 10…
and not have to pretend I know what I’m doing…
I’d be just fine…

But I don’t get to do that…
Instead I am the Jekyll and Hyde of the morning…
I am kind, helpful and a slightly dizzy sweetheart…
Until it happens, I am pushed too far…

And then the “Wrath of Mom” comes out…
I may not lose it right away…
But bits of demon nibble at the edges of my self…
Look closely, you can see the glint of her burning eyes…

Ignore the warnings signs…
And sweet Jolly Jekyll is overwhelmed…
No one is spared from the mental carnage that ensues…
Mother Hyde will take her bit of flesh…

And of course no one gets beat up more…
Than myself…
Hyde has claws like the Wolverine…
They hurt more because they have truth dripping at the edges…

Like a temper tornado…
It passes by quickly…
But the damage can be felt long after…
And clean up is messy…

But soon, the two become a groggy “one” again…
Breakfast gets consumed…
The children make it to school… hopefully…
And no one is the worse for wear…

Or so we hope…
As we enjoy a moment of calm…
Until tomorrow…
When we get to do it all again…

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*sigh*

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Sometimes the best parenting is knowing you gonna fail at some point… be willing to face it… and say your sorry.

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Day 5 of my September project…

Today is “Family Friday” …  When I get to vent… or share a bit of what my family life is like.
I’m not sure anyone cares but me… but there it is… a bit of self indulgence…

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September’s different themes for each day of the week:
“Macro Monday”
“Tale Spin Tuesday”
“Whatever Wednesday”
“Thoughtful Thursday”
“Family Friday”
“Caturday Saturday”
& “Seriously Silly Sunday”

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Image and words by Cicely Robin Laing © 2014

 

 

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