A lot of time has passed since I first made this entry… it was Sept. 16, 2009. My son was just heading off to school, and I had no idea what kind of adventure and challenges life would bring me. I haven’t posted here in some time because I’ve been out trying other things here and there… and mostly trying to make sense of what life has thrown at me. I now have two teen-age daughters and a son who has challenged me like I never imagined. Maybe I’ll write about it here… maybe I won’t. Life can sometimes take up so much time that you can get too busy living it and don’t have time to talk about… We’ll see.
April 1, 2014
If you read my very first blog entry… you’ve already read this!
“Today, my youngest child stepped onto a bright yellow school bus, on his way to a first day of kindergarten… Moments before, he had been an airplane, a rabbit, a bird and a turtle… along with a dozen other imaginary things. All in just five minutes before the bus arrived. I silently wished his new teacher “Luck!” And in that moment for the first time in thirteen years, I was truly alone… not responsible for anyone but myself… or at least, I liked to think that way.
The question was… “What am I going to do with myself? How shall I use this precious time?” After all, I only have those few cluttered hours between 8:35 am & 2:30 pm…. What should I do?… Thankfully, I have many choices before me. I could go get a job?…. Only no one is hiring, and I don’t want any of the jobs I qualify for after being a ’stay-at-home’ mom for a dozen years. I could spend all my time getting the house in order and be the 1950’s style house wife?… No, don’t qualify for that one either as I suck at ‘house work’! Though I do promise myself to get the dump functional again… I could volunteer for anybody and every body, like I have been doing for the last decade… at schools, libraries, theaters, churches, community centers, etc., etc. only to get a quick thank you and to be forgotten in a week?… Well, I’m kind of tired of ‘contributing to society’ and not getting any credit… It’s bad enough that the Social Security folks remind me of my worthlessness in a letter once a year…. No… this time…. THIS time, it is time for ME… THIS time I going to be selfish!
Yes, I said it! SELFISH! Selfish in that, I want to do MY work… I want to spend time doing what ‘I’ do best… for good or for ill. It is TIME for me to be creative, and send my nonsense out into the world! … and not give a damn if anyone wants it or even cares! (If I were a man, this would not be considered selfish… but, I’m still a woman the last time I checked… and so I have guilt.)
So, here I am… All alone… with you. Or should I say me… as no one but myself is reading this yet. I will put my work out there… on this blog, on twitter, on facebook, on a webpage… (and maybe someday in a non digital form too).
But, WHAT you ask? What kind of work do I do?
WHY, what ever I WANT!…. And if you really want too know… you’ll just have to come back and see.